This morning, after much contemplation, I came to the decision to move back to Oklahoma.
I've been thinking about it for awhile now and this morning, between the hours of 12:30 and 6:30, while I was cleaning up vomit from my daughter, I had my moment of clarity. I was miserable in Oklahoma before I moved to Houston, but now my husband is miserable.
A lot has changed since I was in Oklahoma and so I want to give it another shot. I miss having my hubby around and having someone to back me up, the kids miss their daddy and they desperately need his structure, hell, I need his structure.
I always knew that me living in Houston wasn't permanent and so I've been prepared all along to have to say goodbye but something that really took me by surprise was how hard it was to tell my coworkers about me leaving. I never expected to find real friends at work and today when I went in to let them know I was submitting my two weeks notice I started crying, like really crying. I'm going to miss them all so much.
I'm sad about having to leave work but other than that I'm really excited about giving Oklahoma another try. I really want to feel at home again, to have my own space, I'm looking forward spending an evening at home with my whole family again, my own rules, it's going to be great.
I'll definitely look at things differently this time around, I'm not going to take things for granted that I used to, like when my husband annoys me I'm going to stop and think, it could always be worse, my mom could be annoying me instead.