Since having surgery I think I realized for the fist time that what I did, having the Lap band procedure, would be considered drastic by most people. I know you're probably thinking that I'm crazy for just now having this thought but it really hadn't occurred to me as being drastic.
I started blogging again right before my surgery so I didn't really get to explain why I was able to go to such drastic measures without giving it much of a thought and I thought that maybe I should explain myself a little.
In my months away from blogging something happened that was pretty eye-opening for me, my mother was in the hospital. I know for those of you that read my blog before you're thinking, yeah she's been in the hospital a few times so what made this different? Well, this time something happened that none of us expected.
My mother has heart problems, lots of heart problems, she has high blood pressure, and she has an absorption problem where her body doesn't absorb certain minerals like it should; pretty much all of these problems are related to her being overweight her entire life. My mother takes about 30 pills a day just to keep her body functioning like a somewhat normal person.
This past year has been especially rough on her because she continues to go into A-fib (I can't even begin to spell out the whole word), where her heart beats erratically and makes her incredibly weak and oxygen starved. She had 2 cardioversions this year (where they take the paddles and shock your heart back into rhythm) and 1 other hospitalization where her heart went back into rhythm with medication.
After going into A-fib so often this year they decided to do a procedure called an ablation where they cauterize areas of her heart that are causing the arrhythmia. She went in for the procedure and we thought she would be up and about in a week or so, we were wrong. One of the medications they put her on for after the procedure caused her to go into kidney failure so her hospital stay was lengthened, they straightened out the medications and sent her home.
When she got home she wasn't getting better, in fact after a few days I got a phone call from her, she was pretty certain she was dying. My mother is 55 years old, my grandmother died at 56, this was a pretty scary concept for me to be dealing with especially since I had no warning from my family that she wasn't doing well. A few days later she ended up back in the ER and this time they said she had pneumonia, they put her on antibiotics and then sent her home, she still wasn't getting better. A few more days and back to the ER they found that she had fluid around her heart, they put her on a steroid and told her if it wasn't gone by morning she was going in for surgery. The next morning she was better, the fluid was almost completely gone and she could finally breathe again, it was finally over.
After the whole month that this all took place in my family was put through hell, my father was suffering trying to work as hard as he does and still make it to the hospital everyday, my brothers had to check on her constantly, my aunt pretty much lived with my mom during the whole ordeal and her other 4 sisters were all taking turns checking up on her. I pulled Nicholas out of school and spent a week down there helping her recover and the whole time I was just pissed off. You're probably wondering what this has to do with losing weight and why the hell I was so pissed, well, her weight problem was starting to affect a lot more than just her.
I was angry and I resented her for having to leave my husband and pack up my kids and drive 8 hours to take care of her, 2 of her sisters felt the same way I did and that was when I knew I was making the right decision getting the Lap band. I don't want to burden my family with my health, I don't want to take 30 pills a day, I don't want to be out of breath trying to walk down the hall and I really don't want to be fat.
Where Sleeping Dogs Lie
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